Monday, April 18, 2011

I'm back.

Thank you B, for my fabulous welcome home flowers

I'm back, literally, in Hong Kong and on this blog.

I'm so sorry about my lack of posts these last few weeks, I was incredibly busy in Sydney and blogging is (unfortunately) a luxury in my life. Like all good things.

But yes I am back, which means Sydney is over.

Where in the world did those SEVEN weeks go? Is this an indication of how fast my life is passing my by? Is yours moving just as fast or is it just me hurtling towards old age?

If you are new to my blog, I live in Hong Kong and just finished a seven-week work stint in Australia back at my previous job.

It feels like a lifetime ago that I packed my bags, kissed my dogs farewell through pools of tears, attempted to kiss my boyfriend goodbye when the airport train doors closed on us, and hopped on a plane home. I had a lot of fear festering back then... that it would be too long, that the job would be too hard, that I would miss my new home, that I would become depressed.

The opposite was true. Thank you life, God, whomever makes these decisions. You didn't make it hard for me after all... you made it easy.

The job went great and felt like I'd never left, I was able to see my boys on webcam every night, I was sufficiently distracted by a busy workload and plenty of catch-ups with friends, and seeing my family every day for seven weeks straight made it a wonderfully happy time of which I was grateful for. I don't think it could have gone any better.

And then suddenly, after the fastest seven weeks in history, I was packing my bags, saying goodbye to my old colleagues for the second time, hugging my friends, kissing my family, and boarding a plane back to my new home.

I learned long ago that I am prone to fear, panic and anxiety, stemming I'm sure from a very frightening childhood experience. So of course these demons threatened me again as I returned home. What if I had been away too long? What if I missed Sydney too much this time? What if the bond between my boyfriend and I had been broken? Will our dogs even know who I am?

As I landed in Hong Kong choked by such fears, that feeling instantly washed over me again. I call it that feeling because I'm not really sure what it is... it's a mystery to me. All I know is it has a smell. The smell of Hong Kong. Not a bad smell; nor a pretty, perfumed smell, just a musky thick scent that smells unlike anything else. I like this smell. I like this city. I instantly feel more relaxed here, more happy. Like this is where I'm supposed to be. For a perpetual worrier and a girl forever plagued with doubt ("doubt" is such a horrible kill-joy isn't it), it is refreshing and healing for me to live in a place where I feel so little doubt.

That instant feeling of relaxation upon arriving was quickly stifled by the suspicious glares of the immigration officials when I tried to swipe myself in using my resident card. Apparently my visa expired while I was in Australia (oops) so I was whisked away into the 'naughty corner' in the immigration room and eventually let in as a visitor. Better sort that one out.

And, after a long trip home, the last thing left to do was go home and see my boys. Hello butterflies you pretty, pesky things.

In typical Natalie style (never a moment of pause) we actually had a group dinner booked in for that same evening and my plane had been delayed, so we were suddenly in a massive rush. I told B to stay at home rather than trek out to greet me, and when I arrived, he came down to meet me in the cab and brought our pups.

Something comes over me when I don't see B for a time and then see him again. I always fancy him, don't get me wrong, but I can literally lose my breath in situations like this. It's like seeing him for the first time again. I could not stop staring at him. He's so super cute. He seemed larger than life to me and I couldn't believe once again that he was mine. I threw my arms around his neck and didn't want to let him go.

As for the pups, I'm fairly sure they didn't know who I was.

But two out of three aint bad.

1 comment:

  1. Welcome back!!! Glad you have your man and those little treasures back. Nothing quite like being back in your space, with all your things and all your comforts is there?! Can't believe the time's gone so quickly! xx


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